Tuesday, November 2, 2004  4:04 pm  <|>
<193> On edge: I'm technically writing this from work, though I will probably not post these thoughts until later tonight. Today is a very edgy day... between the election and everything else that has been going on lately. As I mentioned in my last post, they had to increase one of the medications I take... and that means the side effects have been effecting me for a few days now. Mostly it makes you feel three specific things: 1-very hungry, even when you eat enough, 2-very hot, especially in your facial area, 3-very edgy, and a little shaky too... this last one is what really gets to you after awhile, because you can be sitting and doing nothing and still feel totally crazy. But I'm already tapered off the really high doses of the medication by now, so hopefully things will show some improvement come Friday for my next doctor's appointment.

The next thing going on today, as I'm sure everyone is aware, is the US Presidential Edition. I successfully voted at 2:30pm today after trying to go before work, especially since my polling place was right on the corner of my block, but the line was so long outside that I knew I would never make it through there and still get to work anywhere near on time. So instead, I took a late lunch break and got a little energy used up walking around in the somewhat not as cold as you would expect weather going on lately. This worked out much better anyway, as there was absolutely no line and I was able to walk right in and out in less than 3 minutes. Now that's my kind of voting! :)

So it's the buzz of the day, this election, and rightfully so since it could change so many things, but at the same time it almost makes you want to hide in a basement somewhere until it's all over and safe to come out again. This election decides so much, it could be deciding so much more than anyone can even predict... and we won't really know the full effect of it until much later than today I'm sure... maybe not even until 4 years from now whatever the outcome may be. I'm sure it's the main topic on blogs around the world. The whole WORLD - people who don't even live here directly wish they could vote and some maybe have more reason to want to than our own US citizens. The whole concept is so strange when you really look at it... they way we handle the voting itself I mean. And it's so close again, maybe closer than last year if that's possible? The polls I see swing back and forth between Bush and Kerry being 49% to 48% each way... so essentially that makes the polls no real predictor. No one is sure of this outcome yet... there doesn't even seem to be any guessing going on - not even on the news sites. So we all sit around today and wait, while others handle the polling places, while others yell on the street and honk, and hope... for whatever the outcome to be, for it to be the one we need as a country and that the world is asking for...

My work day is coming to a close, less than an hour left. I have a HiNgE meeting tonight, as I always do on Tuesday evenings usually. I am feeling so hyper it's making me a mix of really wanting to go and really not wanting to. Yesterday by the time I went home, got Isis to take her to her vet follow-up appointment, and grabbed dinner for Dan and I I was so tired and jumpy that it made me feel weird for the rest of the night. I mean by the time I was finished eating my sushi all I could do was watch 1 1/2 episodes of Stargate SG-1 until Dan got home. It really felt like a wasted night, but I guess that has to happen sometimes. It's just that when I feel this way, really hyper and creative is one of the best ways to explain it, it's hard to keep up my actions and thoughts together. Each part of me is going a million miles a minute... so even though I might have a lot to say, it's hard to type even with typing very fast... and sometimes I'm typing so fast I can't get out everything I want to say... AHH... Hopefully I'll get some things done tonight before it's time once again for sleeping. Oh, that's the other thing I didn't mention... from the medicine, between all those side effects, it makes it very hard to sleep sometimes. Now so far, I haven't had a huge problem once I get settled down to sleep, but I'm dreading when those nights come worse. Most of it comes from being uncomfortable and having your head spinning with a thousand things, but otherwise it's the edgy feeling overall that you just have a hard time putting to bed. I'm starting to feel hot again... so weird since I'm usually very cold. At least I've been through this times in the past, it's better than second guessing everything your feeling... worrying if it is normal or not to be feeling this way from the medicine. That's how medication works though... take some for one problem and give yourself 4 more... but you just gotta weight those things out I suppose and in my case I know I need it. Half an hour to go and works done. I'm going to go get some water and look forward to being able to chill out at home later on. Until later... let's hope for change for the better all around.